"Hello, Old Friend."

In the months leading up to the diagnosis, I tried to keep one toe in MS research and the rest of my body out of the proverbial autoimmune water. I live my life embracing the holographic nature of the universe and posit myself as the create-tress of my life. I believe worrying is truly praying for things I don’t want, so I tried not to put too much energy into believing that I had MS. On the other hand, I wasn’t afraid. Multiple Sclerosis was the first disease I had ever met in my life. In fact, we were old friends from elementary school.

Growing up in the highly racist environment of Spokane, Washington in the late-70s, I was treated by many of my classmates as if I was “less than” from the first day of school in 1st grade. I don’t remember who called me a nigger on the first day during the first recess, but I remember that it was said. I was spit on, made fun of, and called “Weeds” because of my hair until 8th grade (not by someone named Jonathan McClintock). But I could read.

I was only 5 when I entered first grade, but I learned how to read when I was only 4. My reading ability became my shield from the negativity of classmates, my armor against the world, and my source of self-esteem. I was placed in the advanced reading group and often helped my struggling classmates. And then there was the MS Read-A-Thon.

I don’t remember the particulars of what I won every year when the MS Read-A-Thon rolled around, but I still have the shiny, gold certificates somewhere in a scrapbook. I believe in 1st grade, I read the most books in my grade. By the time I got to fifth grade, I had read the most books in my entire K-8 Catholic elementary school. Eventually, I was honored by Mayor Chase at some sort of awards ceremony for reading the most books in the entire city. I received a plaque with a medal and a red watch that featured some sort of Sherlock Holmes-esque crime dog. The MS Mystery Sleuth.

Now, I feel like it was foreshadowing for what was to come in my life. Or maybe, because the force is strong with this one, I called it to me. After all, I always said I wanted four boys. But as the create-tress of my own universe, I am taking it as a sign that if there is a problem, yo, I’ll solve it (check out the hook while my DJ revolves it) as I become my own MS Mystery Sleuth once again.